Where the f*** have you been ?

I felt it only fair to explain my blogging absence to you so treat this blog as a catch up.


I am writing this blog under the influence of Morphine not because I have developed a nasty drug habit and have spent the last month or so in the priory trying to kick it , but because I am currently 3 days post operative.

Therefore I may get bored halfway through and fall asleep , or go off on a tangent but it deals with the pain amazingly well so screw you guys if I do.

So… where the f*** have I been?

Okay since my last blog there have been a few dramas that required my focus, my step-grandmother broke her hip so in between work and homelife I had been travelling across three counties to a different hospital other than the one I work in , visiting and arranging her discharge and follow up care. No I don’t want a medal it’s just what you do but it pretty much took up all of the little spare time I had so blogging took a back seat and quite rightly so. During this time I was also halfway through renovating our kitchen, applying for a new job, getting ready for a two week family holiday abroad and preparing everything for my own scheduled operation which was due to take place upon my return from holiday.

So with the patient finally home and getting the after care she needed I had a little under a week to get the kitchen to a position, which almost resembled completion. This in itself resulted in very late nights, some heated rows with a very tired husband and a diet of mostly takeaways.

In short I am now divorced, fat and very tired and living in utter squalor.

Joke. Well apart from the fat thing I have absolutely put on some chunk whilst kitchen less.

My holiday preparation this year was minimal and very last minute (I think I even boarded the plane with hairy legs). I still hadn’t found out about the job as they were still interviewing external candidates and I was getting very nervous about my own operation, which had failed to be a success the year previous.

If I had of blogged it would have mostly consisted of three words …Fuckerty Fuck Fuck.

Now throw into the mix the fact that I was about to be off work for 3 months and hold a very responsible job, which I 100 % needed to leave in order. The hurdles were big and boy was I going to have to leap over them to the finish line.

But…. I kept focused and with support from colleague’s friends and family I was able to go away for an amazing two week break not only satisfied I had completed my goals but elated with the news that I had also got the job!!!!

The holiday was AMAZING, we met some truly lovely people and I felt relaxed after all the madness.

I am still however pondering why people sunbathe in a face full of make-up? I saw many ladies do this and I felt sorry for their skin, unable to breathe and drink in the vitamin D. Let’s be honest how many of us look fabulous whist sunbathing???

I don’t ….I look shocking bared faced all sweaty with hair looking fifty shades of shite but I couldn’t care less. After day 6 I no longer needed foundation and my skin looked healthy and glowing.

Ta darrrrrrr


Upon arrival home I had one week exactly to turn around all of the holiday washing and ironing (my husband begged me to let him do it of course, but I refused after all he had enough to do with skydiving and playing pool on Facebook). With less than a week until my operation it was once again panic stations.

So you see life sometimes throws up unforeseen events, which challenge the norm, and it’s through dealing with these that we can really test our strength of character.

So here I am I leg in plaster at the mercy of the males in the house. So far the dog has done an amazing job of looking after me that’s all I can say.

PS. I have just had a brace put on my bottom teeth also. Because I love mouth ulcers and not being able to eat properly …

xoxo AJ

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